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Loving Moment

Online Relationships

To meet someone online and building a relationship has a lot of similarities to meeting someone in real life and is becoming more and more common.  The increasing number of happy couples who met online are enough evidence for us to realize that valid relationships can be built from online dating sites.

LatinConexiones does not pretend to have the credentials to be a love expert or a relationship expert but we have a wealth of information that comes from online dating industry and we have many concerned experts in related fields who willingly share advice, concern and guidance for users of our site.  Much of what we share in this article applies to building lasting and meaningful relationships in all areas of our lives.

A true relationship begins with honesty.  In all of our relationships we have the freedom to choose who we want to be and how we want to treat other people.  There are two forms of honesty that are necessary when we use online dating services.  Honesty with ourselves is extremely important when we launch our online activities and we must remain true to our intentions.  We will constantly be challenged because we will certainly meet many new people.  It is easy to become distracted with the many opportunities that will be presented.

Honesty with the new friends that we will meet is exactly what you would expect to receive from them.  Honesty toward your new person of interest is absolutely necessary in the communication as you begin the journey to know each other and again honesty is what you expect because you know how critical it is to your judgement and feelings and the ability to build trust.

There are many profiles of pages on dating sites that ask for trust and respect.  There is a some trust and respect that is granted due to our human nature and because we have been taught the principles of the “Golden Rule”.  But we must deserve the kind of trust that enables us to build and sustain meaningful and lasting relationships.

Not for a specified time period such as through the courting stage.  Trust is earned every moment of every day for the rest of our lives.  And all that we have invested in our honesty for all of our previous moments can be lost in this moment if we choose, if only for one moment, not to be honest.  Once the trust is lost we may or may not be able to restore new trust.

Respect is also earned.  It is also based on honesty, our trustworthiness, and other qualities that we habitually manifest.  Speak with integrity remembering that our actions are a louder form of communication than the spoken word.  Become thoroughly comfortable with doing the right thing.

Focus on the good and honest communication that you can control.  Unlike real life relationships, some people who are online can hide behind a profile and photos and anonymity and may not have the same good intentions that you have.  They cannot be controlled and they cannot be changed.  It is your job to maintain your caution, keep your antennae raised, trust your 6th sense and do your part to make the relationship work.  If you do and the other person does not then you know that the failed attempt was not your fault.  Move forward and begin your new search.

Online dating has many advantages that help users launch their search for their ideal match or their ideal soul mate.  Although many have found a partner it is wise to keep the expectations realistic.

New relationships usually begin with the discovery of many similarities.  When the relationship grows both enter the most intimate core of a person where we may find some slight differences.  This is common.  Different cultural backgrounds, environments and life-experiences produce different reference criteria that influence how we think, feel and how we relate.  Continue the discovery until it is possible to understand how the other person may have been molded to what is you see today.

The similarities are usually revealed early in the communication while the differences take a little longer to surface.  It is necessary to discover those difference so you can evaluate whether they are minor or important to your system of values, morals, ethics and principles.  The possibility of agreeing on everything your new friend says or does is remote and the search for the perfect person should not impede your search for the person who is perfect for you.

There are some keys to identifying similarities and differences that can lead to a happy relationship and they are mentioned in a great article on the internet.  These fundamental areas are mutual respect, the ability to communicate without arguing or fighting, attitudes about sex, agreement on how to raise children, how each handles money, has similar goals and the ability to be happy, have fun and laugh together.

Everything you need to know about your new person of interest can be discovered through communication.  That person should be as anxious to share with you as much information as possible so you can continue to decide to move forward in the relationship.  If you want that person to have the same desire to move forward then you must share as much information about you as possible while remembering to protect your privacy and safety.

Remember, you have the right to ask questions and seek consistency to know if the truths have been stretched or defects have been hidden. You need to know if the indicated values and qualities are really the core of the person, and that the true heart and soul have been revealed. It is not necessary to directly challenge inconsistencies, but warning flags must be recognized to help you.

Couple Enjoying the Beach

Online Dating Etiquette

Online protocol is defined as manners, accepted behavior, rules of conduct, decorum, good practice, the customary code of polite behavior in society or among members of a particular profession or group.  Our group for this discussion is new friends and relationships that are online and just as the rules in face-to-face contact are changing so too are the rules of etiquette changing for online dating.  We all wish to believe that the thread of the Golden Rule still prevails in society whether online or not.

Honesty is not a rule.  It’s a quality that embodies integrity, honor, morality, ethics, principles, goodness, truthfulness, trustworthy, sincerity and is a lifestyle.  The best friendships, relationships and loves all have honesty as their base qualities.  It does not matter what we meet offline or online we all must earn the trust and integrity based on how we conduct ourselves.  And we earn it, or not, always, forever.

Usually the first step to get to know someone online is to like their profile or to show interest depending on the function of the site.  It’s okay to explain why you are interested.  Perhaps it’s the photos that caught your attention.  If so, go ahead and say what caught your attention.  Perhaps it was the smile or the look of sincerity or the situation of the photos.

Maybe it was some of the content in the profile that caught your attention.  Go ahead and comment about what it is that you liked in their profile.  Try to imagine how good you will feel if someone makes nice comments about your good qualities.  Good comments helps the other to know that the interest is real and genuine.

If there is not a feature on the site for you to like someone or show interest then a first message is the way to open the relationship.  Brevity is the first rule.  Be upbeat and positive.  Be complimentary and go ahead and share what led you to send a message.  Remember this is the first message and if there is a connection there may be additional opportunities to share more about yourself.  With the first message you are only trying to find out if there is a spark of interest that comes back to you.

Allow some time for a response.  Offline and face-to-face a hello may receive an immediate response.  The recipient of your message may not be on the site and not aware of the message.  Maybe the message was accidentally deleted by computer/phone issues.  Allow 24 hours for problems to be solved.  If you do not have a response yet and your interest is still alive then it is okay to send a second message.  If there is still not a response then resume your search for another.

Many people do not handle rejection but with online dating they are not being fair to themselves.  If no communication has been established and neither party know anything about the other then how can a failure to respond to a message be considered rejection.  Friendships and relationships and true love are all built on a very powerful connection.  Those connections are developed over time and based on cumulative knowledge of each other.  Move forward and give real relationships an opportunity.

What if you receive a message and you do not have the interest?  It is not necessary for you to respond.  This may sound like poor etiquette or rude but in the world of online dating it is not.  If the person who messaged you has a good understanding of online etiquette and knows that it is not really a rejection then he, or she, will continue to search.  You are not required to provide an explanation.

Communication is different in email messages than face-to-face.  In face-to-face there is opportunity to explain what is meant by what is said.  In emails there is not always that opportunity.  Not everyone has the same background or reference criteria or life experiences.  All of the jokes about he said and she heard and she said and he heard are humorous but in email messages they are sometimes close to real.  The future communication between two people who have just met can be greatly facilitated by both parties acknowledging that further explanations are always at the ready.

If the new friendship begins to flourish there will be plenty of time for philosophies and opinions and passions about things dear to you to surface.  Those will occur in the natural course of things.  In the beginning keep it neutral.  over time both will want to know and you will learn in the communication.

In the real world it is always polite to ask about friending or tagging or a phone call.  Online dating is the same and you are in control of that privacy.  You are also in control of your comfort level if the requests come too early.

To meet someone new is exciting.  If the heart is touched it is more exciting.  But keep your head and remember that the Golden Rule still applies and online dating and communication has not changed it that much.

Happy Married Couple

Matchmaking

Matchmaking has a history that dates back as far as almost 4,000 years ago in cultures where the tradition was that the elders or parents or some other third party believed that the decision to marry was too important to be left to the bride and groom.  Later in our history marriages were also prearranged to consolidate family money or power or for political reasons between countries to seal alliances.  Matchmakers were available to help arrange marriages for all of the reasons except for the true reasons that marriage should occur; love and friendship and a beautiful relationship where both parties connect in all of the important areas.

Matchmaking also occurred in many countries a couple of hundred years before the computer when Mail-Order Bride catalogs became common and featured photos and brief “profiles” of individuals who were available for marriage.  If a person found someone of interest then the correspondence began via messages sent via “snail” mail that would take weeks or months to arrive to the recipients.  If there was interest in the person who sent the message then a return letter was entered into the current mail system and would be received weeks or months later.

Thus began the correspondence between two people and eventually agreement would be reached and one of the partners would get on a ship or a train or a covered wagon and the two would finally meet and marry.  Sounds incredibly slow based on today’s pace of life but it worked and many marriages occurred in this manner.

Matchmaking has endured over our history and has certainly evolved and still serves a large portion of the singles and dating and marriage marketplace.  However, today the individual participants in the marriage-to-be play a much greater role and have more influence in the selection of potential partners.

Some matchmakers function completely independent of the online dating community and some offer something of a hybrid approach where they have an online presence with a large database of potential suitors.  Either way they collect as much information as possible about individuals in database via questionnaires so they can present options to a new client based on their preferences.  They then offer potential partners culled from the database and the client can choose from a number of options.

Many online dating sites have algorithms in the site that learn preferences based on activity when reviewing various profiles.  Over time, the algorithms become more accurate to help you find your marriage partner.

LatinConexiones.com makes use of some of the basic matching capabilities to present possible matches for our users. But we prefer some of the “old” ways of building relationships. We believe that some of the greatest emotions a person can have is to meet new people, make new friends, create new relationships and find love. We believe that there is no greater joy that two people can have among themselves to work together to build a wonderful relationship if it translates into a great friendship or a complete and everlasting love.

We also believe that well after the marriage ceremony the two will spend many moments together reflecting on the memories they built during the early days of the discovery phase of their relationship.  We do not wish to interfere with the creation of those wonderful moments.

We are also well aware that the Hispanic cultures have held onto some of the most positive qualities of their social and family relationships as we have learned to depend upon on our most trusted friends and family members for their thoughts and opinions.  We have found that many members will seek the opinions of their trusted confidants and ask them to join the LatinConexiones site to review the profile of their new interest and offer their opinions and guidance.

We are also aware that many of our members will meet many other members and they may discover a person or a new friend whom they think would be ideal for a family member or close friend.  To that extent we know that many of our members will do matchmaking and we are happy to be able to offer that opportunity.

Couple Hanging Out

Privacy

LatinConexiones, LLC respects the privacy of its users and members and is committed to help protect their privacy and safety.  We encourage all visitors to any of the sites within the family of LatinConexiones sites to review our Privacy Policy and our Safety Policy and our Terms of Service posted on LatinConexiones.com

In addition to the information included in the above stated policies we are offering helpful information and resources to further safeguard privacy.  Remember you are in charge of your privacy and it is prudent to take responsibility for your privacy and your safety through education and caution.

When creating a profile on LatinConexiones.com do not use your real name but rather select a username that you have not used anywhere else.  If you wish to use your real name use a different spelling and again not a spelling that you have used anywhere else.

Do not share your place of employment.  If the online dating site offers a selection from a  menu it is okay to choose an industry.

Avoid posting digital photos if at all possible.  Digital photos may contain metadata on where and when they were taken.  If you take a “selfie” with your cell phone camera and your phone is configured to allow location then the location is revealed.  There are applications that can read and display the metadata for other people to see.  Use new photos that have never before been posted on the internet.  Internet photo identification services can readily track photos that had previously appeared on the internet.

If you have developed a relationship with another user and you have progressed to the point of sharing personal contact information do not share your personal email.  Create a separate disposable email address that you will use only for online dating .

Check the privacy settings on the dating website you choose to see what setting are available.  LatinConexiones.com does not use geolocation, or location tracking, that shows where users are.  Location tracking may help those whom you wish to know your location but it is also available to others whom you do not wish to know.

Keep your antennae raised.  There are warning signs that can help increase you to be cautious.  Beware of information that is being shared to you that is counter to establishing good communications to help build a good friendship or relationship.  An early request to communicate via personal emails or an early request to “meet up” somewhere are two warning signs that should encourage you to move cautiously.

Beware of scammers.  The growth of online dating is phenomenal but along with that success comes the scammers.   LatinConexiones.com has all of the latest and greatest of security for the users and the site itself but the scammers will always be on the internet.  Our best advice is to always be careful and while we know your heart may be beating faster your brain and your intuition are still your best guides.

We suggest that you search the many articles on the internet that are helpful to safeguarding your privacy.  Search for:

  •  Privacy apps that can remove the metadata from your photos
  •  How to remove Geotags from your photos
  •  How to protect your privacy while online
  •  California Online Privacy Protection Act
  • Do Not Track preferences in web browsers
  •  Fair Information Practices Principles
  • Children Online Privacy Protection Act
  • The CAN-Spam Act
  •  Visit https://www.ftd.gov/bcp/menus/consumer/data.shtm for information about how to protect against identity theft
  • Check your Facebook settings since many apps search your Facebook data

Remember most dating sites strive to create a safe environment for you to join a rapidly growing way to meet new friends, build new relationships and maybe find the love you have been seeking.  LatinConexiones.com is among that group of dating sites and is dedicated to help you have a safe and enjoyable experience.

Couple Enjoying the Beach

Safety Statement

LatinConexiones.com is committed to help you have safe, fun, comfortable and successful experiences on our site. Safety is one of our highest priorities and we will continue to help you protect your personal information, your personal well-being and have safe and trouble-free experiences. We stress that your safety is your responsibility and you are in control of your new relationships but we offer the following recommendations to help. We will continue to add resources and sites that have additional safety tips for you to follow as you build your new relationships.

Just as in offline dating most people have good intentions and are also safe people but we must always be cautious and wary of the small percentage who have less than honorable intentions. During online dating it is easier to meet many more people and become excited about the opportunities. Remember, that while we strive to protect your interests it is not possible to ensure 100% that all members have your same interests in mind.

Select an anonymous username that does not include your name and you haven’t used it anyplace else. Likewise, select a unique password for LatinConexiones that you have not used anywhere else. After you enroll on LatinConexiones.com set up an email account that will be used only for any new correspondence generated with your new online relationships. Consider using photos that have been taken only for use on LatinConexiones.com and not anywhere else. Use a separate set of images and selfies or photos. Keep in mind it is possible to run a Google Image Search and another person can discover everywhere that you have appeared on the internet.

If you want additional photos of your new interest ask for photos that show him, or her, in a variety of situations with other people and at different times of their life. Ask a lot of questions when communicating. You should be looking for consistency; a string of integrity. Ask a question and later ask the question again in a different way and a different conversation. You are looking for consistency and honesty.

Do not disclose your identity, phone number or personal contact information until you are comfortable doing so. Keep your communications on the LatinConexiones site until you are absolutely certain you want to move them. Bad characters will try to move them as quickly as possible.

Trust your instincts and remember that your excitement and your instincts are jacked a little – Use common sense. Always be cautious and remind yourself that you know almost nothing about the new people you are meeting. Everything you have learned is being shared with you by someone who is behind a computer screen. If something feels bad, or wrong, it probably is. In the excitement and fun and emotion of meeting someone who may be that person it is easy to let the guard down and forget the natural self-protection.

You can run a background check but remember if a person conducts bad online behavior but has never been caught a background check won’t help. Keep you antennae alert for unusual requests for money, requests for off-color photos, abusive or offensive language, questionable solicitations or intrusive questioning. You are in charge of what you reveal. Block and report suspicious users or anyone who violates our terms of use.

You are in control of your online presence. Do not let anyone take away that control.

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Couple of the month

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